Been thinking a lot lately about Seasons in our life. How they come and go. Some quicker than others and then there are those that go on FOREVER it seems. You might have storms during seasons. Some people may have more storms than others. In every Season we have to learn to listen to the Holy Spirit and pray that God guide and direct those seasons.
Right now I’m in a very busy Season. 5 boys. 14, 10, 4, 3, 14 months. A couple take an extra lot of effort to train up in the Lord or have health issues that take up a lot of time. I’m also expecting a sweet baby Girl so I’m extra tired and lack the energy I need some days. I’ll spare the huge list that goes on each day with maintaining a household with a large family, that we are very blessed at grateful for.
I’ve been the Children’s Director at our church for 9 or so years now. There are so many things I want to do but can’t. There is so much potential for the group of kids and things that need to get done that isn’t happening at this time. This. Season. My. heart. is. with. my. family. My heart longs to do a better job at being a Mom. My heart isn’t in the children’s ministry like it was when I first started. I’m ready to lay it aside and let God use someone to take it to the next level.
Last night in Bible study a few points where made that made me really think. Made me think about my trust in God, or lack of trust at times. Made me realize that I need to let go and not over commit. Made me realize that I need to be better at my calling in life. God knows where He wants to move us on the map. If I won’t allow it, its kinda hard for Him to move me. Is what I’m doing on this earth fulfilling my calling? My calling is to be a Godly wife and mother and right now I’m being pulled in many directions. Am I where I need to be? God will put us to flight if we let Him! I’ve been feeling for a while that I’m not putting my ALL into growing my Boys up and being all I can be for them. Brian and the boys have always come first before job/ministry. However, I’m feeling a stronger pull now to lay the children’s ministry aside during this Season and step up to be better at what God has called me to be. This is a busy Mommy Season and I need to go at it with different ideas, and not be pulled in so many directions!
I’m here on earth to be worked on by God all throughout the many Seasons. I want to grow in Him. I want to walk with Him. If I’m hearing him and feeling His lead as I’ve prayed and others have prayed with me, I need to follow through in obedience and not keep pushing down that voice.
Brian and I have decided my Season as Children’s director at CCC will end at the end of 2014, unless they find that full time director before then. I’m grateful for all who prayed with us and helped me as I talked it out and thought through it the past few months. I’m excited to just fill my plate with my family priorities during this Season which I am sure will pass all too quickly from what I hear.
