It feels like I’m living in a fog. I can’t really explain the way I feel. This is the first time that someone very close to me has died. And while I know he is in heaven, because I know his faith in the Lord and relationship with Jesus was real and very strong. It still hurts, because I miss him very much. Just seems so final here on earth. 
To know I will see him again in heaven is comforting.  However I’m still sad because I won’t see him here on earth again.

We can’t find Pop’s Vietnam hard hat!! Praying we find it.  We are setting up a table at the service of memorabillia to just remember Pop by.

 I had always hoped that my parents would live a really long life so that my kids would grow up and have a relationship with them. I am thankful that three of mine will have memories of Pop.  And I hope we can tell lots of stories and keep his memories alive for them all to feel like they know him too! 

I go through the days working so hard for the Memorial Service and when I’m in busy mode its hard to think.  Its when I stop and “think” that the tears come.  I’ve been going through YEARS of photos and I have so many!! Its been bittersweet.  I’ve enjoyed getting to put together a slide show.  Levi helped choose the songs that have meaning, and the slide show should be a great honor to Pop.  On top of that I’m doing a talk at the service.  I am nervous but know that God will give me strength.  I know for sure Pop would want me to talk so I’m praying that God will work through me to share about Pop and give Glory to God in all I say. 

I’m having trouble helping my own kids grieve, because I’ve never done it myself.  Two of mine are having a tougher time.  Adam and especially Luke.  

Tuesday is the viewing, I still haven’t decided if I’m going to go.  Wed. is the grave-side for the family and then the memorial service will be on Wednesday afternoon.  

I look forward to a day when the fog is lifted!